He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
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