so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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