im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
Randomize
