so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
Randomize
