ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
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