But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
Randomize