Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
Randomize
