we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
Randomize
