It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Randomize
