It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
