So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
I can't put those talents on a resume
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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