i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
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