Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
