Nicole vs. Life
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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