in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
Randomize
