I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
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