i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
