? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
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