No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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