was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
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