Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize
