You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
