we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
His nipple licking is glorious
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