i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
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