I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
