you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
Randomize
