remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
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