After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
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