I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
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