everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
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