didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
