Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Randomize