I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
