dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Randomize