Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Randomize
