Christians are straight up FREAKS
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
