for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize
