You really coming over, don't trick.
Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Randomize
