Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize