I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
I party with great urgency now.
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
Randomize
