good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
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