You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Randomize