i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
Randomize
