There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
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