Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
Never underestimate the power of titties
Randomize
