I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
I think my moral compass just broke
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