I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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