if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
