I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Randomize
