capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
