i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Randomize