Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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