is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Randomize
